Dunno why

I just had a rush of emotion, a gush of sadness overwhelmed me. Reason, unknown. I only know I started tearing, then sobbing and went into a complete out of control emotion release. I felt a sense of loss. Like I lost something. The grief was that kind like departure. For good. The heart wrenched like it did many years ago. The same kind of emotion stirred a storm in my heart. And I , for the first time or once in a long time caught myself crying and for god knows what reason. I for sure am puzzled at this strange behaviour but it did feel strangely good that those tears can be released. A few times this few days I cried in my sleep. Woke up feeling sad n lost. I guess I am scared in my subconcious. Maybe of the future that awaits me.